I admit I have no willpower whatsoever, stopping smoking was easy. I just didn’t buy any. Simple as that. Yes I was slightly grumpy,( more than slightly if I’m being honest) but ten years on and I would never have another, dieting though isn’t quite as easy. You have to eat to survive, it’s not like you can go cold turkey like I did with the cigarettes. Which is why in my 43rd year I am still trying to lose weight. It’s not like I was slim when I was younger, No I was always the fat one.
“You will grow out of it”
“It’s just puppy fat”
“It’s in your genes”
“You’re so pretty who cares what size you are”
“Someone will love you for who you are”
They were all said to me from a young age, now people just stare. I hate going out to eat, people look at you like you are going to eat all the food in the restaurant and leave them with nothing, when the truth be told I eat the same as anyone else. I don’t eat rubbish, although I skip meals I do like a drink and shockingly I do love food. I don’t like processed, I never eat meals or meat that has been in the freezer. The only thing I have in my freezer is a drawer full of fancy ice-cream (not mine, however I may have the odd spoon every now and again) some garden peas, ice cubes and a bottle of Grey Goose. I much prefer homemade, with fresh vegetables, protein with herbs, spices to add that extra flavour. But saying all the I am still overweight and I need to face facts and do something about it.
Here the problem lies…
I joined Slimming World, the not having to weigh food is a lot easier for my lifestyle and I don’t find it as restrictive. However I am one of those people who need help, support from people in the same situation as me so stopping to class not just to get weighed. I asked my leader if they had a Facebook group, these days they are groups for everything and even though they are plenty of groups already on Facebook the sizes of the groups, I find are too big. I would much prefer a smaller group where you can share your experiences get to know and support each other. But no, no group ” I am on Facebook you can ask me for help at any time” was the leaders response to my question. Well yes, but I don’t want to wait days, 4 days to be precise.
Then there is the class itself.
Sitting in a room speaking to people about who lost x amount or who put on this week ( oh never mind at least you tried) and clap after each person, well I am sorry but I’m not five this is what I see in schools. I want to learn new recipes, what new products have come out, even testing something that has been made. I mean there are recipes in the magazines that could be tried out, whats up and coming. Even a new event that may be of interest,recently there was a midnight walk for the local hospice, how about telling people about that doing it as a group even if only a few wanted to participate. Fitbit challenges, loads of people have them these days, there are so many things you could discuss. I want to go to class and learn how I can improve my diet, try new foods/products, not sit around listening to how someone has been to Aunt Maud’s 80th birthday and still lost weight, yes a round of applause. The people who haven’t done so good wont get any benefit from hearing this. Slimming World needs to up their game. Its been the same for years.
It’s not for me, it doesn’t help me and I would rather be doing something else. I have to sit through things at work that I don’t want to, so I am not going to do it in my free time. So there it begins, I end up just going to get weighed, then after a bit I just stop doing that. I can do this on my own I tell myself, but I can’t. I’m a failure. I lapse into the old habits of missing meals, drink a glass of wine and then the pounds start to creep back on.
To the people who get something from the classes that’s great, but I don’t. I have an Instagram account where I post my meals, albeit very sparse these days and that helped but I need more. It’s just a shame that something that has great potential leaves me feeling like I’m a child back in the school assembly after sports day.
Congratulations Beverly for taking part in the skipping race ( that I lost) now lets all give her a round of applause…